My Teenager Wears 2T

So, Avery turned 13 this week. Or so you’d think by the way she’s been talking to me!!

Today I asked her to sit in the shopping cart. Her response?  “Yeah, ok, boss!”  She’s also started ending her responses to me with “sister” Like, “Yeah, whatever you say, sister!”  On more than one occasion she introduced me as “Sarah” which normally doesn’t bother me much, but when it’s said like this: “Oh, this is my friend Sarah” to the Starbucks barista, with a sideways glance, as if I’m the tag along, and she was forced to bring me. I’m a little taken aback.  Your FRIEND??  Your friend SARAH??  WHAT?

Screen Shot 2014-12-09 at 9.49.02 PMWHAT THE ACTUAL HECK, KID?!  Who are you?  You’re 2 and  half! You’re supposed to be calling me Mommy! Not boss, not sister, not your FRIEND SARAH!

Here’s another example that she’s 2 going on 13:
Me: “Avery, what do you think of this shirt?”
Avery: “Uhm…I think…NO WAY!”
Me: “Really? But it has a cute puppy wearing reindeer antlers on it, isn’t it so cute?”
Avery: “I think NO! I never wear that!”
Me: Screen Shot 2014-12-09 at 9.49.55 PMWill one of you please tell me that we’re just getting through this angsty phase early, and when she actually does become a teenager she’ll be the sweetest, most wonderful teen that ever lived? I mean, this doesn’t mean that I’m “in trouble” right?  RIGHT??

Yeah…that’s what I thought…

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